My Final Day

...as a 23-year-young woman. On this, the auspicious Valentine's Day, I spend my final hours in a year that has meant so much, has been so successful, so easy-going, so worry free. My youth has succeeded in winning this year. Nary a plan has been made for my future, which officially ends in August along with my lease. I live my day hour to hour, my months week to week, and my life minute to minute. Life inexorably plows onward, but I take the time to appreciate only what's before me, even if it ultimately turns into a stoned stupor from which my brain cannot escape. Is this a good thing? Or a bad? I have yet to decide. I honestly should give up smoking, I know, but I have no reason to. When I do, I don't think I'll miss it. For now, it keeps me company.

Flawed elements of my 23rd year: I had far too little sex. I had my car broken into and my purse stolen. My cat killed a neighbor's guinea pig. I planned not one iota into the future. I spent the entire year single. Entirely my own fault, but still a stupid flaw. I grew up a little bit, but I feel it only made me more aware of how much growing I still have left to do.

Good things of my 23rd year: I did have sex with Cane and Clark. So it wasn't totally sexless. Just the last 7 months or so. I got a job at Emma. I was introduced to and fell in love with climbing, yoga, and running. Very regular exercise became a big healthy change in my life, along with a drastic overhaul of my eating habits. I lost weight (?). I became a damn good dresser, if I don't say so myself. And I do. As Kirida put it, "Why you so fine, girl?"

I'm getting there, anyhoo.

Today is eventful. My last day with 23 (although I do think 24 sounds sexier - why is that?). The first truly warm day of 2011. I woke up before my alarm, happy and giddy for no good reason. Oh yeah, Cayden asked me to lunch excusemewhileIhyperventilate. Even crazier than this practically impossible situation of a lunch date with him is the fact that I turned him down. WHAT ON EARTH WAS I THINKING? In my defense, today's lunch from Caroline was epic (there were beets!), and I can't turn down free lunch. Oh right, and then we got tangled up having a conversation about this little gem. Thus why I got really stoned and spent an hour at the gym laughing at Sex on the City with probably every other single person in Cityville. The sexiest girl I've seen in a while got on the treadmill just in front of me, and I drooled over her while she shook around in her Lulu running skirt. I gotta get me one of those!

Time for shower, cereal, and vibrator. Happy Birthday to me!

xoxo
Gillian